It’s no secret that some people hate success. If you’re going to the top, you’re guaranteed to make an enemy or two on the way—so it should come as no surprise that, if you experience success, you’ll also cop a fair bit of hate. What should surprise you is who exactly is doing the hating. Believe it or not, it’s going to be your boyfriend.
In a joint study between the Universities of Florida and Virginia, researchers got couples to perform a series of five tasks focusing on social or intellectual achievements. They found that while successful results for the male partner made both participants feel happy, successful results for the female partner transformed her boyfriend into a seething bundle of hate. In the afterglow of their partners’ success, most men saw their self-esteem plummet, even if the two had not been in direct competition during the task. This lowered self-esteem manifested itself in a particularly depressing way—the men were more likely to suggest their relationship had no future after watching their partners succeed than if they succeeded. By contrast, the women celebrated their boyfriends’ success, apparently unaware they were going out with total jerks
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